Unconditional Love Does Not Mean Being A Doormat

Unconditional Love Does Not Mean Being A Doormat

Every once in a while someone claims online that I am not a spiritual person, or my NDE is not credible, because I assert my legal rights when necessary. They seem to think that a true NDEr is sweetness and light all the time and never stands up to someone who abuses them. That view is not the understanding I gained of unconditional love in the afterlife. 

Unconditional love applies to a person--not a behavior. We can love a person unconditionally and still hate some of his/her behaviors. The key is that we do not come to hate the person because of the behaviors. We do not judge the person unworthy of our love because of their hateful behaviors. That is the type of unconditional love I learned about in the afterlife. Unconditional love is love that does not judge a person unacceptable and unlovable because they make mistakes, even egregious ones.

We innately have and show unconditional love while we are in the afterlife. But we are presently living human lives, not spiritual ones. We are capable of being physically and emotionally hurt while in these human hosts. As guardians of our bodies, we have the responsibility to protect them from harm just like we do our children and pets. That responsibility gives us the right to stand up for ourselves and our bodies and to refuse to endure the hurtful actions of others. Loving someone and accepting them unconditionally does not mean we have to suffer abuse at their hands.

So many times we say to ourselves, "he didn't mean it." Or "I'm used to it. It doesn't bother me." Or we make some other excuse for someone treating us badly. We have been brainwashed into believing that we have to stay in an abusive marriage, job, friendship, family, or any other type of relationship if we love the abuser. We have been taught to understand and accept their bad behaviors and harden ourselves as best we can to their harmful effects. We believe this because our religions and cultures teach us to "turn the other cheek." That is a human concept of love based on dominance and submission--not a description of unconditional love.

Unconditional love allows us to love the perpetrator but escape his/her wrongful behaviors. We can leave the abusive marriage, job, friendship, etc. We can stand up for ourselves within those relationships and say: "I love you but I will not allow you to treat me that way anymore." Then, if the abuser is unwilling to change, we find a way to avoid the behavior, up to and including leaving. Perhaps Al-Anon says it best: "detachment with love." We can detach ourselves from being in the line of fire of abuse and love the abuser from a safe physical or emotional distance away.

Nanci L. Danison, JD, afterlife experiencer, attorney, and author of BACKWARDS: Returning to Our Source for Answers, BACKWARDS Guidebook, BACKWARDS Beliefs: Revealing Eternal Truths Hidden in Religions, and the Light Answers to Tough Questions series of CDs and DVDs (A.P. Lee & Co., Ltd., Publishers). Visit me at www.BackwardsBooks.com or watch me on YouTube.

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New Beliefs for a New Year

Sometimes people think that their beliefs are innate, inviolable, and cannot be changed without changing who they are. Yet consider how many belief changes you have already made since childhood. Do you still believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, or that stepping on a crack will break your mother's back? Religious and spiritual beliefs likewise change as we learn more about their origins, and as life changes our viewpoints.

The beginning of a New Year is often a time for reflecting upon the old and anticipating the new in our lives. I hope you will take a moment to reflect upon your spiritual beliefs and to consider whether you might be ready for some new ones. Here are a few to consider:

I believe Source created me as a special, much loved, integral part of itself.

I believe we are all equal in Source. No being, not human or spirit, is more important to Source than I am.

I believe love is my true innate spiritual nature.

I believe Source's love is constant, regardless of what I do. But I am responsible for my actions and I, and others, do suffer the physical and emotional consequences of my choices.

I believe I am a powerful spiritual being, not a human animal. I only inhabit this body. It is not ME.

I believe I do not have to be a slave to my human host's likes, dislikes, motivations and emotions. I can exercise my spiritual free will to tame and train my body to act less like an animal and more like me.

I believe acts of loving kindness can change the manifested physical world.

I believe my truths are inside me, not out there somewhere. I will know the truth, because it will resonate with me and fill me with love, not fear.

Have a wonderful New Year!

Thank you so much for being open to the messages I returned from the afterlife to share.
Nanci
PS. The world is not going to end this year, no matter what one might infer from the Mayan calendar.
Nanci L. Danison,

www.BackwardsBooks.com.

Vida después de la muerte - Nanci Danison

Nanci cuenta su increíble experiencia ewn 1.994 cuando después de una mamografía difícil, su cuerpo murió y al volver le fue dado el regalo de recordar toda la experiencia con lujo de detalles.