You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge

Psychologists use the term “perceptual defense” to describe those things our minds cannot face up to. This is commonly called “denial” and damages every aspect of our lives. Why? Without first being able to see and name the problem, you’ll never be able to deal with it; over time it consumes you.

Follow the way of Alcoholics Anonymous when looking at your life: You can only get better once you admit you have a problem. “What most people want is not truth, but validation,” McGraw says. We desperately want to be right, even if what we are doing is not working. But to have change, you must do differently.

Philip C. McGraw